It’s Friday January 8, and I’m pleased to be reporting on the Chicken Trotters’ first outing of 2016. Desperate for topical and interesting content, I have decided to use an animal based theme today - which is that David LAMB and Mike FOX formed a three-ball with Steve Cole, but to maintain the theme Stephen is re-named Steve KOALA! Thus, in one fell stroke we have an Ovine, Vulpine and Ursine trio performing in a Galline based competition! Right! - if anybody is still awake - here are the results:

Ten Chickens had faith in the weather forecast and set out on a slightly moist - but still playable - course, reduced to 14 holes. The weather turned out to be quite delightful, with blue skies, sunshine and gentle breezes, and some of us took advantage of the conditions to return admirable scores.

Starting at the bottom of the pile, Paul Davies scored tactically, claiming the 30p Booby prize, but cunningly adding two strokes to his handicap. Mel Hicks worked hard to score 24 points, sadly his reward is merely this mention!

The victors, in reverse order, were: third, scoring 24 points off a 26 handicap and winning a paltry 30p - Neil Dickinson. Second with 25 points off a generous 23 handicap and earning just 60p - Derek Cole. The winner, with a fine score of 28 points over 14 holes, and playing off a tiny nine! - Steve Koala! Steve earned great respect and £1, and will be weighed down by a handicap of four next next time out.

There were a pair of twos, the first since October last year, and both on the 12th. Stan Hudson’s two was a birdie, since he doesn’t get a shot, but it added three points to his score and won him a whole 25p. Mike Fox’s two was a nett albatross, since the Chicken Trotters’ card still shows hole 12 as Stroke Index 8, thus the score read 2 for 0 for 5 points - Huzzah! (Actually, I was just a tad disappointed at only being awarded 25p - but I did wallow in the desultory applause when it was presented!).

The field scored a total of 28 ‘blobs’ and the CSS was 23 points. Several balls were lost in the deeper puddles, but who cares? - we all had a game of golf in the sunshine.

M.F.